Fighting for Curves
This is a very personal blog. A blog that reflects the opinions of oneself only. It is a blog that is willing to challenge, but this post in particular is the post that is willing to announce my biggest secret. It is not a secret that I have purposely kept hidden in the depths of my closet, but it is in fact a secret that I just do not share with the world. Until now of course.
That secret is weight obsession. You cannot put me into a bracket; I am not anorexic, I am not obese, I am not bulimic but I am living with the constant fight for curves. It began long before I can remember. My household has always possessed a set of scales, and I have weighed myself every day for as long as I can ever remember. I mean that quite literally. I felt that I was over weight throughout Primary school, Secondary school, college and no doubt in September, unless I suddenly lose a great amount of weight, I will feel fat throughout University.
So is this Media influence? Maybe. I may well be another typical girl, targeted by the media and paparazzi but if I am, well done them. They succeeded. Every day of my life is a fight against food. For example. It is 6:30PM, today I had DRY All-Bran flakes for breakfast. For dinner I had one fun size red apple and another bowl of bran-flakes, and for tea I had half a melon and ten green grapes. Yes I counted them, and yes I checked the calories on the box. Is it an obsession? It may be.
P.E throughout Primary school was a killer. Born with naturally large breasts and a weight obsession I did not wish to change in the changing rooms. The toilets were my get-away. My saviour.
Girls throughout history have fought to be skinny. All you have to do is watch the production of 'Gone With The Wind' to see just that. I do not wish to be too skinny. I do not wish to be over weight. I strive for the body that we see on the television. The one that does not exist I suppose.
The question that I wish to arise is who is responsible for a generation of 'weight obsessors'? I take responsibility for myself, I believe it is my own conscience that will make me who I am, and not what I see on the television. However, if you feel the same, who do you feel is responsible for your actions?
Ladies, you are not alone. The last time I had a cake, a biscuit or a packet of crisps was December 2011. (As far as I can remember). It kills me to watch my step father eating donuts and cream cakes and chocolate bars one after the other. I reach for a piece of fruit. Ladies. I encourage you to be proud of who you are, before it is to late.
Boneata Bell
(Image supplied by Google)
So is this Media influence? Maybe. I may well be another typical girl, targeted by the media and paparazzi but if I am, well done them. They succeeded. Every day of my life is a fight against food. For example. It is 6:30PM, today I had DRY All-Bran flakes for breakfast. For dinner I had one fun size red apple and another bowl of bran-flakes, and for tea I had half a melon and ten green grapes. Yes I counted them, and yes I checked the calories on the box. Is it an obsession? It may be.
P.E throughout Primary school was a killer. Born with naturally large breasts and a weight obsession I did not wish to change in the changing rooms. The toilets were my get-away. My saviour.
Girls throughout history have fought to be skinny. All you have to do is watch the production of 'Gone With The Wind' to see just that. I do not wish to be too skinny. I do not wish to be over weight. I strive for the body that we see on the television. The one that does not exist I suppose.
The question that I wish to arise is who is responsible for a generation of 'weight obsessors'? I take responsibility for myself, I believe it is my own conscience that will make me who I am, and not what I see on the television. However, if you feel the same, who do you feel is responsible for your actions?
Ladies, you are not alone. The last time I had a cake, a biscuit or a packet of crisps was December 2011. (As far as I can remember). It kills me to watch my step father eating donuts and cream cakes and chocolate bars one after the other. I reach for a piece of fruit. Ladies. I encourage you to be proud of who you are, before it is to late.
Boneata Bell
(Image supplied by Google)
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