This Is Me

Seni Ozledim. I miss you. The crazy smile that You placed on my face. The struggled walk in high heeled pace. Seni Ozledim. I miss you. The music and madness fighting for air, Drunken rabble, hijackers beware. The single tear. The single tare. Seni Ozledim. I miss you. The sun by the sea, The hand waving at me, Seni Ozledim, benim askim. perfection thanking. You. Seni Ozledim. I miss you. Thousands of paths ready to walk, Love being a bolder never taught. Wished away, Wished closer. Confused array Of emotion mixed. Entwined by his. Seni Ozledim. I miss you. Boneata Bell 26th August 2012 18

The bike. A journey between two people, And time. In a place of mine. Between two junctions. The bike. Speeding head first across An ocean view. Time spent in two. Time too quickly speeding. The bike. Black metalic and hot to touch, Scarring skin pebbles and rocks A view of perfecion. The bike. A holiday perfection, Within my reflection. A smile of The eyes. And a smile Of the heart. Boneata Bell 14:42 26th August 2012 18

I once had a layout about my life, that I knew that I would live by. I decided that what I wanted to be was a journalist and what I would study would be journalism. Things changed for me. I began working at Estuary Radio twenty-one weeks ago and it offered me so many opportunities, so now I could be a presenter, a journalist and of course the ultimate dream, a poet. Within the twenty-one weeks things have changed dramatically. Last week I received the phone call breaking to me the news of my course closure, leaving me with two options; fly or fall. This was where I could either 'drop' the idea of University and get a job, or take on the ultimately scary challenge of another course - Professional Writing. Now that does sound silly. I am a writer. I write poetry and articles every day of my life, but I am not yet a novelist. I do not have an extremely high knowledge of the English language. I break the rules where the lines are drawn - I will put a metaphor next to a simile,

This is a very personal blog. A blog that reflects the opinions of oneself only. It is a blog that is willing to challenge, but this post in particular is the post that is willing to announce my biggest secret. It is not a secret that I have purposely kept hidden in the depths of my closet, but it is in fact a secret that I just do not share with the world. Until now of course. That secret is weight obsession. You cannot put me into a bracket; I am not anorexic, I am not obese, I am not bulimic but I am living with the constant fight for curves. It began long before I can remember. My household has always possessed a set of scales, and I have weighed myself every day for as long as I can ever remember. I mean that quite literally. I felt that I was over weight throughout Primary school, Secondary school, college and no doubt in September, unless I suddenly lose a great amount of weight, I will feel fat throughout University. So is this Media influence? Maybe. I may well be anoth